Why Some Athletes Could NEVER Get a Different Job . . . .

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: JUNE CERRETA
Date: Sat, Sep 17, 2011 at 4:39 AM
Subject: Fw: Why Some Athletes Could NEVER Get a Different Job . . . .

To:

 

JUST IN TIME
FOR FOOTBALL SEASON!


 
 
WHY ATHLETES
CAN'T HAVE REGULAR JOBS
:
 
1.  Chicago Cubs outfielder
Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to
look up to me. I wan' all the

kids to copulate
me."
 
2. New Orleans Saint RB George
Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500
yards, whichever comes first."
 
3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of
the 'Skin's say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen
of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."
 
4. Torrin Polk, University
of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treat us like mens. He let
us wear earrings
.."
 
5. Football commentator and former
player Joe Theismann: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is
a guy like

Norman Einstein."
 
6. Senior basketball player at the
University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it
takes."
(Now that is
beautiful)
 
7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State
football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height…" And, "You guys
pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."
 
8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike
Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went
to prison for three years, not Princeton."
 
9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks
left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker:
"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my
clothes."
 
10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing
trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a
guy who gets up at six

o'clock in the morning, regardless
of what time it is."
 
11. Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina
State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous
at practice:
"My sister's expecting a baby, and I
don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."
 
12. Frank Layden, Utah Jazz
president, on a former player: "I asked him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it
ignorance or apathy?'
He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I
don't care.'"
 
13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach
at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one
D:
"Son, looks to me like you're
spending too much time on one subject."
 
14. In the words of NC State great
Charles Shackelford: "I can go to my left or right, I am
amphibious."
 
15. Former Houston  Oilers
coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the
road trips,
Phillips responded:
"Because she's too damn ugly to kiss good-bye."

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